January 27, 2006
In The Headlines
A wave of animal cruelty has the World Wildlife Federation up in arms. On the first day of this new year a lion was found viciously mauled. A week later, a bengaled tiger was discovered horribly beaten. While the lion only had fresh wounds, the tiger appears to have been suffering
regular beatings for years.
Just seven days after that, a colt was found battered. People at the scene said it kept muttering something about not getting enough protection. A few days ago, Denver authorities found another horse, this time a bronco, wandering the streets. The horse was not physically injured,
but quite dazed and confused. When asked about the incident, the hapless horse said “I was at home and everything was fine. I was about to feed my pet snake when he started choking and screaming about some sort of terrible towel following it around.”
Rumor has it that the next target will be some sort of bird, a seahawk. All of the victims report trying to peek behind a giant steel curtain shortly before their incidents. As a result, the following warning has been issued to all animals:
Peek behind a steel curtain, get hit by THE BUS.
Author Unknown
Posted in
News | By Amy at 10:42 pm |
Comments(3)
Go Steelers from Berlin!(A communications museum with random robots and a video of an asian woman opening and closing her mouth repeatedly)
Next Sunday is going to rock, mass at the Vatican in the morning, and provided my hostel doesnät totallz suck(I hate German kezboards)watching a Steelers victory at night(does not come on till after midnight here, but hey)
Go Seahwaks! ahhmmmhhmm. Actually as I said previously I am not a huge football fan so I don’t really care . And I should probably should support the steelers since as a newsarticle here said, you don’t have much else to live for in the winter over there. Joking. Seriously, go Seahawks.
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Yeah, that news article is about right. This place DIES when football season ends. 15 years or so ago, we had hockey to keep us warm, but then Mario got old and all the other good players ditched us for more money because goodness knows Pittsburgh fans are loyal if the team does well but we’re CHEAP. lol. That, and all that’s left here are college kids and old people.